We Would Not Be Here

This Sounds Like A Brag, But I Know How To Make Good Fried Rice. I Learned In College. There Are Two Secrets - Take The Rice After You Cook It And Let It Get Cold In The Fridge. Then Cook The Egg Like You're Making A Fried Egg And Just Before It's Done, Dump The Rice And Veg On It And Swirl It Around.

Stand-up Is Something I Just Truly Love To Do, So I'll Always Go Back To It. I'll Never Stop Doing It, That's For Sure.

I'm Grateful That I Had That Uphill Battle For 10 Years Of Going Onstage And Having Nobody Know Who I Was, Because You Have To Win Them Over.

Zombies Can't Believe The Energy We Waste On Nonfood Pursuits.

Everything We Have Today That's Cool Comes From Someone Wanting More Of Something They Loved In The Past. Action Figures, Videogames, Superhero Movies, Ipods: All Are Continuations Of A Love That Wanted More.