When I Was Young I

The Eleventh Plague Hits Disturbingly Close To Home An Excellent, Taut Debut Novel.

You're Punishing Him Over And Over For Things That Are Out Of His Control. Now, I'm Not Saying You Shouldn't Have A Fully Loaded Weapon Next To You Round The Clock. But I Think It's Time You Flipped This Little Scenario In Your Head. If You'd Been Taken By The Capitol, And Hijacked, And Then Tried To Kill Peeta, Is This The Way He Would Be Treating You?" Demands Haymitch. I Fall Silent. It Isn't. It Isn't How He Would Be Treating Me At All. He Would Be Trying To Get Me Back At Any Cost. Not Shutting Me Out, Abandoning Me, Greeting Me With Hostility At Every Turn.

Once I'm On My Feet I Realize Escape Might Not Be So Simple, Panic Begins To Set In. I Can't Stay Here. Flight Is Essential But I Can't Let My Fear Show. Winning Means Fame And Fortune, Losing Mean Certain Death, The Hunger Games Have Begun . . .

I Think Of The Snarling, Cruel Exchange Back On The Hovercraft. The Bitterness That Followed. But All I Say Is "i Can't Believe You Didn't Rescue Peeta." "i Know," He Replies. There's A Sense Of Incompleteness. And Not Because He Hasn't Apologized. But Because We Were A Team. We Had A Deal To Keep Peeta Safe. A Drunken, Unrealistic Deal Made In The Dark Of Night, But A Deal Just The Same. And In My Heart Of Hearts, I Know We Both Failed. "now You Say It," I Tell Him. "i Can't Believe You Let Him Out Of Your Sight That Night," Says Haymitch.

Plutarch Rushes To Reassure Me. "oh, No, Katniss. Not Your Wedding. Finnick And Annie's. All You Need To Do Is Show Up And Pretend To Be Happy For Them." "that's One Of The Few Things I Won't Have To Pretend, Plutarch," I Tell Him.