When You Look At Hitler

One Of The Things I Keep Learning Is That The Secret Of Being Happy Is Doing Things For Other People.

My Mother Was The Sweetest Lady Who Ever Lived On This Planet, But If You Tried To Tell Her That Jesus Wasn't A Christian, She Would Stomp You To Death.

When I Lost My Rifle, The Army Charged Me 85 Dollars. That Is Why In The Navy The Captain Goes Down With The Ship.

You Hear Entertainers All The Time, Saying, 'if I Couldn't Get Paid For This, I'd Do It For Free.' When's The Last Time You Ever Heard A Business Person Say, 'if I Couldn't Get Paid For Being Chairman Of British Petroleum, I'd Do It For Free'?

Political Promises Are Much Like Marriage Vows. They Are Made At The Beginning Of The Relationship Between Candidate And Voter, But Are Quickly Forgotten.