Whenever I Play With Him

You Could Buy My Book In A Paperback Edition For A Dollar, And In Hard Covers For $3.50. And For Fifty Cents Extra, I Come Around To Your House Personally And Wet Your Finger While You're Turning The Pages.

Everybody Is Afraid They Won't Have Any Money After They Die, But Jack Benny Discovered A Way To Take It With Him. He Had His Appendix Taken Out And A Piggy Bank Put In.

Be Happy You Guys. Be Proud! You Know What You Are: You're God's Frozen People.

That's Life. The Older You Get, The Tougher It Is To Score.

When They Asked Jack Benny To Do Something For The Actor's Orphanage - He Shot Both His Parents And Moved In.