You're The Reason Why Selfless

You Might Not Be Ready For Diplomacy With Beijing If You Can't Visit The Olympics Without Insulting Our Closest Ally.

Now, I Know That He's Taken Some Flak Lately, But No One Is Prouder To Put This Birth Certificate To Rest Than The Donald. Now He Can Get To Focusing On The Issues That Matter. Like, Did We Fake The Moon Landing? What Really Happened In Roswell? And Where Are Biggie And Tupac?

America Can Do Whatever We Set Our Mind To. That Is The Story Of Our History, Whether It's The Pursuit Of Prosperity For Our People, Or The Struggle For Equality For All Our Citizens; Our Commitment To Stand Up For Our Values Abroad, And Our Sacrifices To Make The World A Safer Place. Let Us Remember That We Can Do These Things Not Just Because Of Wealth Or Power, But Because Of Who We Are: One Nation, Under God, Indivisible, With Liberty And Justice For All.

You Know, In College, I Smoked A Little Pot, Did A Little Blow.

The Politics Around Trade Has Always Been Tough, Particularly In The Democratic Party, Because People Have Memories Of Outsourcing And Job Loss.