You Think When Gym Teachers

I Live In New York City, But It Doesn't Matter If You're In Any Large, Metropolitan Area, There's Kind Of A Little Bit Of Survival-of-the-fittest, So When You Encounter Kindness Or People Going Out Of Their Way In An Empathetic Way, It's Almost Startling.

I Believe That Comedians Do What They Do, And Then They Get Credit Or Criticism For Doing It. There's Nothing Planned About This.

I Always Imagine That If I Met Dr. Seuss, He Would Be Very Similar To Crispin Glover.

We All Take Mother's Day Seriously And Then It's Like A Month Later, A Bunch Of Kids Get Together And Say, "i Guess We Should Do This For The Old Man, Too." Father Day's Is Weird. It's Like Celebrating Darth Vader's Birthday. It's Odd I Think. Even The Gifts We Give Dads. Like Neckties, Which Are Just Like A Silk Noose. Or Books. Would You Ever Want Someone From Another Generation To Give You A Book?

If You're A Guy Over 30 By Yourself In The Hotel Pool, You Automatically Look Like A Murderer Who's Just Relaxing After He Strangled A Family. "yeah-that Dad Was A Tough One To Kill."