A Sigh Is An Amplifier

With My Luck, If I Ever Invested In General Motors, They'd Bust It To Corporal!

I Love To Watch Those Old Movies On Late-night Television, Particularly When A Couple Get Up From A Champagne Dinner In A Posh Restaurant And The Hero Hands The Waiter $3. But The Best Part Is When He Says, "keep The Change."

Older People Shouldn't Eat Health Food, They Need All The Preservatives They Can Get.

Remember The Days When You Let Your Child Have Some Chocolate If He Finished His Cereal? Now, Chocolate Is One Of The Cereals.

Lincoln Was Known To Have Walked Miles To Borrow Books, To Get The Most Rudimentary Form Of Education. So What Do We Do On His Birthday? We Close The Schools!