A Two-pound Turkey And A

I Know You've Been Married To The Same Woman For 69 Years. That Is Marvelous. It Must Be Very Inexpensive.

The Price Of Christmas Toys Is Outrageous - A Hundred Dollars, Two Hundred Dollars For Video Games For The Youngsters. I Remember A Christmas Years Ago When My Son Was A Kid. I Bought Him A Tank. It Was About A Hundred Dollars, A Lot Of Money In Those Days. It Was The Kind Of Tank You Could Actually Get Inside And Ride In. He Played In The Box It Came In. It Taught Me A Very Valuable Lesson. Next Year He Got A Box. And I Got A Hundred Dollars' Worth Of Scotch.

I Have No Use For Eight Houses, 88 Cars And 500 Suits. I Can't Eat But One Steak At A Time. I Don't Want But One Woman. It's Silly To Have As One's Sole Object In Life Just Making Money, Accumulating Wealth.

Happiness Is Discovering The Prune Juice Your Doctor Ordered You To Drink Has Fermented.

We Have Two Kinds Of Air: Regular And Chunky Style.