At My Age I'm Envious

I'll Tell Ya, I Don't Get No Respect... The Other Day, I Got Back From A Business Trip. I Got In A Cab And Said To The Driver, "hey! Take Me To Where The Action Is!" So Ya Know Where He Took Me? He Took Me To My House!

The Sign On The Bar Said: 'girls- Topless, Bottomless', I Went Inside And There Was Nobody There!

Last Week I Told My Psychiatrist, 'i Keep Thinking About Suicide', And He Told Me From Now I Have To Pay In Advance.

All My Wife And I Do Is Fight About Sex. The Other Night, We Really Had It Out. Well, I'll Put It This Way - I Had It Out.

When I Was A Kid I Got No Respect. When I Went On The Roller Coaster, My Old Man Told Me To Stand Up Straight.