Attack Life, It's Going To

Folks, I Don't Trust Children. They're Here To Replace Us.

I Live By Syllogisms: God Is Love. Love Is Blind. Stevie Wonder Is Blind. Therefore, Stevie Wonder Is God. I Don't Know What I'd Believe In If It Wasn't For That.

A Father Has To Be A Provider, A Teacher, A Role Model, But Most Importantly, A Distant Authority Figure Who Can Never Be Pleased. Otherwise, How Will Children Ever Understand The Concept Of God?

I've Always Been A Big Fan Of Beauty. Sure, You Can't Judge A Book By Its Cover But Who Wants To Have Sex With A Book?

Forgot To Live-tweet The Election Last Night, So I'm Post-tweeting Today. I'll Start As Soon As My Fingers Unclench From Their Rage Fists.