Cats Have Nine Lives. Makes

No Matter How Much You Give A Homeless Person For Tea... You Never Get That Tea.

My Favourite Road Sign Is 'falling Rocks'. What Exactly Am I Supposed To Do With That Information? They May As Well Have A Sign Saying "random Accidents Ahead", "life's A Lottery, Be Lucky."

Eighteen Years Since The Chernobyl Disaster. Is It Just Me Surprized? Still No Superheroes!

All Comedians Are A Bit Attention-seeking And I'm No Different. Anyone With The Audacity To Want To Be Listened To For An Hour And A Half Must Be.

I Used To Buy Lottery Tickets Every Week Until I Realised You Could Watch It On Tv For Nothing.