I Can't Get No Respect.

It's Nice To Be The Best, But Not When Being The Best Brings Out The Worst In You.

With My Wife I Don't Get No Respect. I Made A Toast On Her Birthday To 'the Best Woman A Man Ever Had.' The Waiter Joined Me.

When I Was A Kid I Got No Respect. The Time I Was Kidnapped, And The Kidnappers Sent My Parents A Note They Said, "we Want Five Thousand Dollars Or You'll See Your Kid Again."

I Saved A Girl From Being Attacked Last Night. I Controlled Myself.

What A Dog I Got, He Found Out We Look Alike, So He Killed Himself.