I Know A Guy Who

If Life Was Fair, Elvis Would Be Alive And All The Impersonators Would Be Dead.

Ronald Reagan Just Signed The New Tax Law. But I Think He Was In Hollywood Too Long. He Signed It, 'best Wishes, Ronald Reagan.'

When A Comic Becomes Enamored With His Own Views And Foists Them Off On The Public In A Polemic Way, He Loses Not Only His Sense Of Humor But His Value As A Humorist.

Democracy Means That Anyone Can Grow Up To Be President, And Anyone Who Doesn't Grow Up Can Be Vice President.

Married Men Live Longer Than Single Men. But Married Men Are A Lot More Willing To Die.