I Met The Surgeon General

My Wife's So Dumb, She Got A Nail In The Spare!!

I Told My Doctor, "i've Swallowed A Bottle Of Sleeping Pills" And He Told Me To Have A Few Drinks And Get Some Rest.

And My Girlfriend, She's Fat! How Fat? She's So Fat She Wears Two Watches-one For Each Time Zone!

I Once Had A Problem ... So I Tried Group Sex. Now I Have A New Problem - Who To Thank.

I Tell Ya, My Wife, We Get Along Good Cause We Have Our Own Arrangement. I Mean, One Night A Week I Go Out With The Boys And One Night A Week, She Goes Out With The Boys.