I Want To Start Saying

Are You There Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea. Please Get Me Out Of Jail And I Promise I Will Never Drink Again. Drink And Drive. I Will Never Drink And Drive Again. I May Even Start My Own Group Fashioned After Madd, Mothers Against Drunk Driving, But I'll Call It Awltdash, Alcoholics Who Like To Drink And Stay Home.

There's A Difference Between Watching A Chef Show, Which Doesn't Feel Like A Reality Show Compared To The Housewives. Those Shows Can, I Think, Not Only Lower Your Iq, But Really Just Knock The Wind Out Of You, Because We're All Here In This Business.

Before Any Exposure On Tv, I'm A Real Chef.

Everyone Knows If You're Going To Take Weed To School, You Put It In Your Trapper Keeper To Keep It Fresh.

I Don't Think The Problem Is Telling People You're On A Diet. The Problem Is Eating Ice Cream For Breakfast.