I Went To The Airport,

Because Of Acid, I Now Know That Butter Is Way Better Than Margarine.

I Wish I Could Play Little League Now. I'd Be Way Better Than Before.

Foosball Screwed Up My Perception Of Soccer. I Though You Had To Kick The Ball And Then Spin Around And Around. I Can't Do A Back Flip, Much Less Several Simultaneously With Two Other Guys.

I Find A Duck's Opinion Of Me Is Very Much Influenced By Whether Or Not I Have Bread.

My Apartment Is Infested With Koala Bears. It's The Cutest Infestation Ever. Way Better Than Cockroaches. When I Turn On The Light A Bunch Of Koala Bears Scatter. But I Don't Want 'em To, You Know, I'm Like "hey, Hold On, Fellas. Let Me Hold One Of You. And Feed You A Leaf."