If I Ever Saw An

Coffee Is Like A Bra. 3 Cups Is One Too Many.

If I Could Control The Behavior Of Fat Guys I Would Make Them Ride Mopeds More Often.

Sometimes I Use My Jokes As Building Blocks For Larger Bits. I Like To Draw And Play Music, So Sometimes I Do Those Things Along With The Jokes.

Clothing Sizes Are Weird, They Go: Small, Medium, Large And Then Extra Large, Extra Extra Large, Extra Extra Extra Large. Something Happened At Large, They Just Gave Up. They Were Like, 'i'm Not Doing Any More Adjectives; You Just Keep Putting Extras On There.' We Could Do Better Than That: Small, Medium, Large, Whoa, Easy, Slow Down, Stop It, Interesting, American.

Once I Started To Look I Finally Began To See.