I'm The Type Of Guy

I Was At Yankee Stadium One Time At 5 A.m., But That Was To Buy Angel Dust

For A Degenerate Like Me, Vegas Is Like A Walk Down Memory Lane. Last Time I Went To Vegas, I Went To My Old Coke Dealer's Kid's Bar Mitzvah.

When You Did Impressions On 'madtv,' The Producers Gave You A Walkman That Played Huge Sections Of Whatever Movie Was Being Parodied, With Your Character's Catchphrases Recorded On A Loop. You'd Wear This Thing Around During Rehearsals And For A Week Listen To The Voice You Had To Impersonate Over And Over Again. It Drove All Of Us Crazy.

I Have A Bad Gambling Problem. You're Not In Show Business For 12 Years And Dress Like This Without A Bad Gambling Problem.

It's Not A Drug Problem, Until You Run Out Of Money. Until Then It's Just Drugs.