It's A Lie, But Heaven

Humor May Be Defined As The Kindly Contemplation Of The Incongruities Of Life, And The Artistic Expression Thereof.

How Strange It Is, Our Little Procession Of Life! The Child Says, "when I Am A Big Boy." But What Is That? The Big Boy Says, "when I Grow Up." And Then, Grown Up, He Says, "when I Get Married." But To Be Married, What Is That After All? The Thought Changes To "when I'm Able To Retire." And Then, When Retirement Comes, He Looks Back Over The Landscape Traversed; A Cold Wind Seems To Sweep Over It; Somehow He Has Missed It All, And It Is Gone.

The English Are Terribly Lazy About Fighting. They Like To Get It Over And Done With And Then Set Up A Game Of Cricket.

The Great Man... Walks Across His Century And Leaves The Marks Of His Feet All Over It, Ripping Out The Dates On His Goloshes As He Passes.

American Politicians Do Anything For Money... English Politicians Take The Money And Won't Do Anything.