I've Always Been Able To

Really? If I Could Hate My Trainer? That Would Be Ideal. I'd Prefer To Despise This Person With The Fire Of Ten Thousand Suns. So When I Walk - Nay, Crawl - Out Of Here At The End Of My Workouts, I Want To Lull Myself To Sleep By Picturing My Very Talented And Inspirational Trainer Getting Hit By A Bus. A Bus That I Am Driving.

Point? Maybe You Aren't A Carrie Or A Samantha Or A Charlotte Or A Miranda. Maybe You're Just You.

Some People Are Destined To Be Deep Thinkers. I Am Not One Of Those People.

You Know What It Was Like? It Was Like Thinking I Was Heading To A Surprise Party And Instead It Was A Surprise Pap Smear.

I've Determined The Ideal Job For Me Is One Where I Can Write Clever Essays About My Life And My Employer Will Give Me Enough Money Not Only To Live A Comfortable Existence, But Also To Buy Many, Many New Pairs Of Shoes.