I've Never Hit A Woman

I Never Worry About Being Driven To Drink; I Just Worry About Being Driven Home.

How Well I Remember My First Encounter With The Devil'ss Brew. I Happened To Stumble Across A Case Of Bourbon - And Went Right On Stumbling For Several Days Thereafter.

The Low-ceiling Price Bazaar For Sexual Relief Was A Street Called Middie Alley. You Could Barely Get A Pushcart Through This Avenue. Top Price-twenty-five Cents.

The Work I'm Doing On The Screen Differs From That Of Anyone Else. My Comedy Is Of A Peculiar Nature...no Writers Have Been Developed Along The Lines Of My Type Of Comedy And This Is Why I Sometimes Have Differences With Writers, Supervisors And Directors Alike.

I'd Take A Bromo, But I Can't Stand The Noise.