Money Will Not Make You

I Have Had A Perfectly Wonderful Evening, But This Wasn't It.

I Don’t Have A Photograph, But You Can Have My Footprints. They’re Upstairs In My Socks.

I Did Toy With The Idea Of Doing A Cook-book. . . . I Think A Lot Of People Who Hate Literature But Love Fried Eggs Would Buy It If The Price Was Right.

I Started Smoking As Soon As I Went On The Stage. I'd Make Cigars Out Of The Morning World When I Was A Kid.

Many Years Ago I Chased A Woman For Almost Two Years, Only To Discover That Her Tastes Were Exactly Like Mine: We Both Were Crazy About Girls.