Now Don't Get Me Wrong,

I Would Say My Return To My Faith Is - It's A Very Personal Thing.

I Watch A Lot Of Tv, I Drink A Lot Of Coffee, But You Know What's Really Addictive? Heroin.

I Love Sleep. I Need Sleep. We All Do, Of Course. There Are Those People That Don't Need Sleep. I Think They're Called 'successful.

I Was Watching Animal Planet. Did You Know That The Male Seahorse Has The Baby? And I Was Thinking, "why Don't They Just Call That The Female Seahorse?" You Know It's Just Some Stubborn Scientist. "yeah, That One There's The Male Seahorse." And His Assistant's Like, "uh, Bill, That One's Having A Baby." ... "the Male Has The Baby. You're Fired."

I Wish, In Some Ways, I Was The Type Of Comedian Who Could Do Something Blistering And Topical, But I'm The Guy Who Gets Stuck In The Revolving Door And Thinks I Should Write About That.