Practically Everybody In New York

He [groucho's Father] Had Absolutely No Training, And If You Had Ever Seen One Of His Suits, You'd Realize What An Accurate Statement That Is. You See, Pop Never Used A Tape Measure. He Didn't Believe In It. He Said He Could Just Look At A Man And Tell His Size, With The Result That Frequently He'd Make A Pair Of Pants With One Trouser Leg Seven Or Eight Inches Longer Than The Other.

Believe Me, You Have To Get Up Early If You Want To Get Out Of Bed.

Laugh And The World Laughs With You, Cry And You're Probably Watching The Wrong Channel.

In America You Can Go On The Air And Kid The Politicians, And The Politicians Can Go On The Air And Kid The People.

You Know I Could Rent You Out As A Decoy For Duck Hunters?