The Car Bomb Was Fertilizer,

Do You Want To Know Why Marijuana Is Illegal? Because The Drug Companies Want Marijuana To Be Illegal. You See, If It Came Down To Prozak Versus Marijuana, Prozak Would Lose.

You Can't Deny That Religion Has Done Some Good. It Organizes Lots Of Anti-poverty Programs And Soup Kitchens And Missionary Work. But I Would Say That, First Of All, All Those Things Can Be Accomplished Without Religion. You Can Be Ethical, Somebody Who Does The Right Thing Without Feeling That He Has To In Order To Get His Ass Saved In The Next Life.

It Was Quite A Sight To See Obama Next To President Hu. Obama Has A Nobel Peace Prize In His Basement, And Hu Has A Nobel Peace Prize Winner In His.

I Was Watching Ashlee Simpson On Jay's Show Last Night... She Was Really Singing, And I Was Saying, 'bring Back The Lip Synch'... And It Struck Me That Ashlee Simpson Is A Lot Like George Bush - Because She Wouldn't Even Really Be In The Big Leagues If It Wasn't For Family Connections, And She's In Way Over Her Head. And She Doesn't Know What To Do. And She Blamed Her Band.

If You Think You Have It Tough, Read History Books.