You Don't Want To Shock

I Did 15 Shows A Week When I Lived In New York. I Did Five Shows On A Friday And Seven Shows On A Saturday. It Was Everything I Did And It Was My Sole Source Of Income.

I Have The Show Because I'm Insecure. It's My Insecurity That Makes Me Want To Be A Comic, That Makes Me Need The Audience.

If I Have Sex, I Know My Quarterly Estimated Taxes Must Be Due. And If It's Oral Sex, I Know It's Time To Renew My Driver's License.

I Have This Mistress: Show Business.

When You Go To Standup, There Seems To Be A Common Denominator Of Some Form Of Need Or Want For Validation From The Audience That Maybe You Were Lacking As A Kid.