You Might Be A Redneck

You Might Be A Redneck If You Consider Your License Plate Personalized Because Your Dad Made It In Prison.

You Might Be A Redneck If You're Moved To Tears Every Time You Hear Dolly Parton Singing I Will Always Love You.

I Hope Someday We Can Stamp Out Illiteracy In America. Of Course You'll Have To Kill Alot Of My Relatives To Do It.

People Would Say, Can We Develop A Sitcom Around You? And I Would Say, Not Interested. I'm Very Happy Doing Standup And Writing And Taking My Kids To School.

It's Hard To Think Of Yourself As A Loser At 2 Years Old.