I Get Up Every Morning

When You Stop Giving And Offering Something To The Rest Of The World, It's Time To Turn Out The Lights.

Critics Are Eunuchs At A Gang Bang.

I Thought To Myself, 'why Not Write A Bestseller?' In The First Place, More People Buy Them And More People Read Them. You Make More Money And It Doesn’t Take Any More Time To Write A Bestseller Than It Does To Write A Book Nobody Buys.

When Jack Benny Has A Party, You Not Only Bring Your Own Scotch, You Bring Your Own Rocks.

How Did I Ever Get Sick? I've Already Had Everything.