I Have No Idea Where

I Contemplated Suicide. My Main Concern Was That I Would Not Make The New York Times Obituary Page.

Just When You Think There's Nothing To Write About, Nixon Says, "i Am Not A Crook." Jimmy Carter Says, "i Have Lusted After Women In My Heart." President Reagan Says, "i Have Just Taken A Urinalysis Test, And I Am Not On Dope."

Every Once In A While Your World Stands Still... There Are Certain Friendships That Are So Important They Leave A Mark On You Long After The Person Is Gone.

As My Good Friend Al Capp Told Me A Few Years Ago, The Best Thing To Do With A Confirmed [hotel] Reservation Slip When You Have No Room Is To Spread It Out On The Sidewalk In Front Of The Hotel And Go To Sleep On It. You'll Either Embarrass The Hotel Into Giving You A Room Or You'll Be Hauled Off To The Local Jug, Where At Least You'll Have A Roof Over Your Head.

I Worship The Quicksand He [richard Nixon] Walks In.