I'll Do Anything For My

Recently, I've Ventured Into The Mammal Family - So That's Good For My Sex Life.

I Thought I Was Raptured Up Into The Air Today; Turns Out, It Was Just My Gas Oven Exploding.

When I Was A Kid I Used To Pray Every Night For A New Bicycle. Then I Realised That The Lord Doesn't Work That Way So I Stole One And Asked Him To Forgive Me.

My Girlfriend Said, Emo, I'm Seeing Another Man. I Said, Well, Try Rubbing Your Eyes Or Something.

I Always Wanted A Beautiful Loving Wife And She Always Wanted To Be A Citizen.