It Would Be Great If

Last Week I Told My Wife, If You Would Learn To Cook, I Could Fire The Chef. She Said, If You Could Learn To Make Love, I Could Fire The Chauffer.

I Worked In A Pet Store And People Would Ask How Big I Would Get.

Comedy Is In My Blood. Too Bad It's Not In My Act.

I Told My Wife The Truth. I Told Her I Was Seeing A Psychiatrist. Then She Told Me The Truth: That She Was Seeing A Psychiatrist, Two Plumbers, And A Bartender.

What A Dog I Got, His Favorite Bone Is In My Arm.