My Heart Is A Bargain

The Laziest Man I Ever Met Put Popcorn In His Pancakes So They Would Turn Over By Themselves.

Beer: Helping Ugly People Have Sex Since 3000 B. C.

I Am An Expert Of Electricity. My Father Occupied The Chair Of Applied Electricity At The State Prison.

Few Things In Life Are More Embarrassing Than The Necessity Of Having To Inform An Old Friend That You Have Just Got Engaged To His Fiancee.

I Don't Believe In Dining On An Empty Stomach.