Show Business Is My Life.

I've Never Gambled A Dime. Never, In All My Years In Vegas.

I Have My Own Gym. When You Do Jokes And They Sell, You Get A Gym.

I've Got An Accountant Who's Been With Me Forty Years. If He Makes A Mistake, He Dies.

Eddie Fisher Married To Elizabeth Taylor Is Like Me Trying To Wash The Empire State Building With A Bar Of Soap.

Half The Battle Is That People Have To Like You Before You Say One Joke, One Bit Of Humor.