You Know You Are Getting

And Humor Has Always Been A Weapon. You Want To Get Even On Somebody? You Want To Attack Somebody? Make Fun Of Them.

The Other Day My House Caught Fire. My Lawyer Said, "shouldn't Be A Problem. What Kind Of Coverage Do You Have?" I Said, "fire And Theft." The Lawyer Frowned. "uh Oh. Wrong Kind. Should Be Fire Or Theft."

I Was A High School Throw-out.

I Just Never Saw My Mother In Any Other Room But The Kitchen. There Were Always Pots Going.

You Know You Are Getting Old When People Tell You How Good You Look.