I Asked My Wife, 'is

A Homeless Guy Came Up To Me On The Street, Said He Hadn't Eaten In Four Days. I Told Him, "man, I Wish I Had Your Willpower.

If Sex Is A Pain In The Ass, Then You're Doing It Wrong.

When My Old Man Wanted Sex, My Mother Would Show Him A Picture Of Me.

I Have Tried A Little Kinky Stuff. A Woman Called Me And Said, 'i Have Mirrors All Over My Bedroom. Bring A Bottle.' I Brought Windex.

Don't Talk About Yourself So Much...we'll Do That When You Leave.