I Tried, It Was Hard,

Fletch Then Kisses Me On The Forehead Before Opening The Cabinet Under The Coffeemaker To Grab Placemats And Napkins. Retrieving These Items Is His Job Because I Kind Of Don't Like To Bend. I Also Refuse To Carry Anything Heavier Than My Purse.

Although I Get A Lot Of Specialty Services Like Wraps, Scrubs, And Mustache Removal, My Favorite Is The Simple Manicure/pedicure. They Work On Your Hands And Feet At The Same Time While You Sit In A Vibrating Chair. I Call It The Sorority Girls Version Of A Threesome.

I've Always Been Able To Cook Italian Food. That's In My Blood Because I'm Half Sicilian.

In Real Life, I Tend To Yell At People A Lot. Not Because I'm Bossy Or Mean, But Because I'm Frustrated.

I'm Not Lazy. I'm Simply Judicious About Excess Movement.