My Problem Is That I

We Lived In A Neighborhood That Was Too Rich For Us. When I Was Young, I Had To Deliver Groceries To The Homes Of The Kids I Went To School With. I Had To Go To The Back Doors To Make The Deliveries. It Was Embarrassing. That Was One Thing Out Of A Hundred.

I Tell Ya, It's Tough To Save A Buck. Right Now I'm Supporting Two Fighters. My Wife And Her Mother.

My Wife Can't Cook At All. She Made Chocolate Mousse. An Antler Got Stuck In My Throat.

I've Been Writing Jokes Since I'm Fifteen. Not Out Of Happiness, But To Go To A Different Place, Because Reality Wasn't Good To Me.

My Wife Has To Be The Worst Cook. I've Got The Only Dog Who Begs For Alka-seltzer.