One Night I Asked A

My Wife Made Me Join A Bridge Club... I Jump Off Next Tuesday.

I Went To A Gay Bar, They Wanted Proof Of Sex So I Showed Them, They Said It Wasn't Enough.

When I Was Kidnapped As A Child My Parents Sent A Letter To The Hijackers Me Pay 5,000 Dollars Or Your Back

When I Was A Kid I Got No Respect. I Played Hide-and-seek. They Wouldn't Even Look For Me.

I Came From A Real Tough Neighborhood. Why, Every Time I Shut The Window I Hurt Somebody's Fingers.