You Think You're So Cool

I'm Very Detail Oriented. I Think That's Why People Enjoy My Memoirs - Because I Tend To Remember Everything.

You Know What It Was Like? It Was Like Thinking I Was Heading To A Surprise Party And Instead It Was A Surprise Pap Smear.

As I Examine My Life Through This Book, I Can't Help But Wonder If My Mother Was Right. Maybe I Really Was What I Ate. And Maybe If She'd Let Me Eat A Little More Sugar, I'd Have Come Out Sweeter.

I Believe That I Have Such A Vanilla Life.

I Still Believe In The Holy Trinity, Except Now It's Target, Trader Joe's, And Ikea.